Unf*** Your Feed: Reclaiming Your Relationship with Social Media

Social media can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it connects us to communities, ideas, and inspiration. On the other, it can flood us with feelings of not-good-enoughness, insecurity, and throw us deep into comparison mode. We’ve all been there—scrolling mindlessly through our feeds only to feel a pit in our stomachs as we see someone living their “best life,” causing us to question everything about our own.

The Social Media-Mental Health Connection

You’re not alone in these feelings. In fact, research has shown a clear link between social media use and mental health issues. A recent study found that individuals who spend more than three hours a day on social media are more likely to suffer from mental health problems like anxiety, depression, and feelings of isolation. While this stat is alarming, it’s important to note that even if social media doesn’t lead to a serious mental health crisis for everyone, it is still a major source of distraction. And distractions have a sneaky way of affecting our mental well-being.

Think about it: every time you scroll through Instagram, Twitter, or TikTok, you’re not just losing time. You’re distracting yourself from being fully present with your feelings, your goals, and your loved ones. That subtle disconnect can build over time, creating a sense of emotional distance from the things that matter most.

So, what do we do about it?

The Full Break vs. Mindful Use

For some, the solution is to take a complete social media break. If you find yourself compulsively checking your feed during every moment of downtime, it may be necessary to hit the pause button. Deactivating your profiles, even temporarily, can be a powerful way to break the habit and regain control over your time and energy.

But for others, social media isn’t something that needs to be cut out completely—it just needs a serious overhaul. This is where mindfulness comes into play.

Using Social Media Mindfully

What do I mean by mindfulness with social media? It’s about becoming aware of how social media makes you feel and reclaiming control over what you consume (they don’t call it a feed for nothing!). Here’s how to get started:

1. Pay Attention

First, slow down. Start paying attention to how every post makes you feel. Is your feed filled with posts that inspire and uplift you? Or do you often find yourself feeling jealous, inadequate, or angry? Many of us mindlessly scroll through our feeds, completely unaware of the emotional impact it’s having on us. But each of those feelings is a cue—a chance to pause and ask yourself, “Why am I feeling this way?”

2. Unfollow What Triggers You (Or Use It to Heal)

Once you start paying attention, you’ll notice certain accounts or posts that trigger negative emotions. One simple approach is to unfollow anyone who doesn’t align with how you want to feel. If someone’s content constantly puts you in comparison mode, it’s probably time to curate a more positive feed.

However, there’s another option—use your triggers as an opportunity to grow. When you feel jealous, judgmental, or frustrated, dig deeper. Ask yourself, “What exactly is bothering me about this? What emotion am I feeling?” This can help you uncover underlying desires or insecurities. For instance, if you’re jealous of someone’s life of luxury and travel, maybe it’s not about the material things—they may represent a deeper yearning for freedom and adventure in your own life.

3. Be Mindful of What You Truly Want

This self-reflection can lead to powerful insights, but be careful. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you want something just because someone else has it. Always check in with yourself to make sure your goals and desires truly align with who you are, not just what you see. For example, you might realize it’s not about buying expensive things, but about seeking more meaningful experiences like travel or time off to recharge.

Align Your Feed with the Life You Want

In the end, it’s not about quitting social media entirely (unless that’s what you need)—it’s about reclaiming how you use it. By slowing down and reflecting on what you consume, you can turn social media into a tool for growth and inspiration instead of a source of distraction and insecurity.

If you’re ready to take this process a step further, my Elevate Your Life Planner offers guided questions designed to help you clarify what you truly want in life. It’s a powerful tool for setting meaningful goals that align with who you are, not just what you see. For a deeper dive into some of the unconscious habits and thought patterns that may be holding you back, my Elevate Your Life Journal is the perfect companion. It’s filled with prompts that help you start taking control of your life, one mindful step at a time.

So, start paying attention, unfollow the noise, and mindfully curate a feed—and a life—that truly reflects the person you want to become.

Take care and be gentle with yourself!

Sara